Let There Be Darkness: Embracing The Whole Truth

Hello, my beautiful reader,

So, I found myself taking full advantage of the silence around me. I decided to pray and speak to myself, expressing my desire to give more.

And what does that look like, you may ask? That looks like me not only allowing people to experience the optimistic, vibrant, youthful, playful version of me but also the part of me that experiences fear, sadness, anger, and heartache.

So, I said to myself: Let there be darkness.

In the book of Genesis, God said, Let there be light. Well, let there be darkness, too.

I’m writing this for you, but I’m also writing this for myself because, for as long as I can remember, I’ve prided myself on being the embodiment of optimism, positivity, harmony, and love. However, I’ve expressed to so many people, on so many occasions, that it’s not easy to maintain a positive attitude. It’s not easy to always see the best in something or someone—especially when, on the contrary, I experience anger, frustration, and irritation.

When it comes to my friendships, dating, and even showing up on this platform, I want to share more of my darkness. And I think this is a message for anyone:

What if we were more vulnerable?
What if we allowed people to see us cry more?
What if we allowed people to see us lash out—not because we’re trying to hurt anyone but because we’re frustrated, sad, or longing for love?

What if we opened ourselves up and allowed people to see us at our worst?

So, let there be darkness.

I think there is power in our darkness. I think there is power in our shortcomings. I think there is power in all the so-called negative emotions we experience as human beings.

That is how this post came to be—Let There Be Darkness. And I love it so much because it resonates with me so deeply.

Even in dating, each person I’m seeing right now would probably say:
“Oh, she’s confident. She’s beautiful. She’s intelligent. She’s no-nonsense. She’s sexy. She’s positive. She inspires me.”

Yeah, but honestly? On the flip side…

Sometimes, I feel alone.
Sometimes, I feel sad.
Sometimes, I feel angry.
Sometimes, I feel irritated.
Sometimes, I feel like I’m missing a love I’ve never even known.

I just can’t seem to stop missing this person, actually.

But yeah, you know what I’m saying? What would it be like if I allowed the men I date to see me like that—instead of just seeing me as this positive, as long as you do what I want type of woman?

What would come of it if I allowed a man to see my heart like that?

That’s what I’m thinking about.

As always, with love

H.